I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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