You're so nebulous sometimes
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
