You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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