I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
there is another microwave in the elevator.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize