Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
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