it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
