I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
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