Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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