I am in a vortex of obligation.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
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