Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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