We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
