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I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
