I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
