we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
