What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize