I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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