I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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