dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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