ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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