I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
