Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
