I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize