TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
