And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
