God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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