Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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