no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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