Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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