I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
