i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
