is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
