Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize