i think my mom watched the whole time
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
