listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
