So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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