And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
