she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize