the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
