She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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