he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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