hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
