I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
my being single is dangerous.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
