dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
