Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize