oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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