I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
