only if we run a train.
done.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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