I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
