I am puke
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
