Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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